Friday, 17 March 2017

He Always Leaves Room

It has been a pretty rough ride for me these past months but I can say, hand over heart,  that God always leaves room for thanksgiving. I cannot think of one single day where I did not have cause, in the midst of my grief, to praise God. And I actually believe that it is those times of gratitude that have saved my mind. Being able to find things to thank God for kept hopeless despair at bay.
In this post, I just want to share some of the ways God has left me ‘room’ to thank him even in my darkest hours.

I remember getting the news of Sholly’s passing.  In those first crazy days, the one person I kept thinking about was my Papa, my Prof. How would he have felt? It was bad enough having to deal with my Aunty Silifa. Oh my, I cannot tell you how happy I was, even as the tears coursed down my face that he had passed two years earlier. How would I have consoled him? I sent up thanks to God for sparing my father such pain and grief.

It;s all about you my love.
It will always have something to do with you
Bliss On my AburoChild!

Then God gave me another reason to be thankful when the horror of what would have been occurred to me. Had I not gone on a business trip to the Netherlands in March 2016, the last time I would have seen my sister before she passed on would have been when she got married in 2010. Ah! That would have been so, so, so painful. But my God so good, so loving, so merciful who knows the end from the beginning, he organised my life to make our times in 2016 happen. Those days, those nights and the photos we took together are now priceless memories.

My older children, through all of this, have also been schooled. There are some things I believe my MGM and I would not have to explain to them anymore about relationships. There are some questions we will ask them in the future that, now, they will understand. You see, they have been there with me right from the beginning of this drama and looked on and listened as it all played out. They are wiser and for that, I thank God. By God’s grace, they will not make the same mistakes my sister and I made.

In this craziness, I have felt support like never before from around the world. In those first few weeks, I had colleagues come from work with their lunches telling me they would not eat if I did not eat. I had old classmates from miles away calling me, sending me music and scriptures and just encouragement. One Sistafriend cooked all the food we ate on New Year’s Day! Another is the face and passion behind the entire Justice for Shola campaign on One SisterFriend I had not been in touch with too often read the story in the Punch Newspaper and in a blink  led a whole set of ladies to set up a Whatsapp Prayer group just to cover me and mine in prayer through this all. While yet another took it upon herself to organise the media conference with Dr. Joe Okei-Odumakin.

How can I forget the Sistafriend who took it upon herself to foot the bill of our stay in Abuja when we went to meet the Polish Ambassador? The major inroad we made into the government? The person that hooked us up and got us the appointment with the Polish Ambassador? Yes, an old secondary school senior! There has not been one day that has gone by where I am not touched by one Godsent Angel or the other and I thank God for that. I could not be experiencing all that and be hopeless.

Because of this, I've had family who hadn't spoken to each other in a year, speak all in a bid to get to the bottom of this. I gave thanks. Sholly did that. Through this, young ladies are taking steps to equip themselves with the information they need to make better relationship choices. I have had messages from women married to people from different cultures thanking me for pointing out things they had never thought of before. It’s so rewarding to find some value to this pain, you know?

(courtesy of Google imagines)

There are just so many things to say but I am sure you get the picture now. I have lost both parents and I have had to deal with (and am still dealing with some really painful things) but I can tell you for free that losing Shola is the most painful thing I have had to deal with in my life. Yet, I am blessed enough to be able to find the ‘room’ that God has left me to thank Him.

And one of the biggest things I thank God for is for giving me another opportunity to live through something that really demonstrates that ‘what does not kill you will only make you stronger’. Through this, I have learned the truth that in our weakness, God is made strong. I have had to rely 100% on God’s strength in me to go on and I mean it. There have been moments when I lay on my bed and doubt the possibility of me making it through the day. But I ask God to help me anyway. And he does. Each time that happens, I know again, that God is real.

Out of this horrible mess, solid good will come. Tangible good. Yes, many more things to be thankful for will come. And my sister’s name will be linked to each one of them. I will see to that and God will help me. Of this I am sure.

So, let me just end by asking a favour. No matter what you are going through, please look out for that ‘room’ God is leaving you, to thank Him. It’s there. You just have to think about it.



  1. I feel you Sis. Indeed God is so loving and faithful that He ALWAYS leaves room for us to praise Him. He is too caring to leave us in the 'valley' . All we need do is that in those challenges and periods of pain,look to Him and not to those circumstances. Surely tangible good will come out of the ashes.

  2. I feel you Sis. Indeed God is so loving and faithful that He ALWAYS leaves room for us to praise Him. He is too caring to leave us in the 'valley' . All we need do is that in those challenges and periods of pain,look to Him and not to those circumstances. Surely tangible good will come out of the ashes.

    1. Tangible good...... Amen.
      Thanks Ore.

  3. Thanks Aunty Salt. There's always beauty in the mess and when the storm passes we can are able to see through the debris. Afterall God's word tells us that nothing can separate us from his love...and this love assures us that ALL things work together for our good.

    1. There is always beauty in the mess. I love that. Yes, many beautiful things will come out of this beautiful mess. In Jesus name. Amen.

  4. Can't stop thanking God for your beautiful heart! ,,,,brings tears to my eyes ....the power of our Fatger's love, the tenderness of your heart.....Love you so much! ����

  5. This is so encouraging. I bless God for 'making room' right in the middle of pain and tragedy. For real, all things work together for the good of those who love the Lord and trust in Him. I bless God for you and thankful that He has kept you and yours through it all and is still keeping. Bless God always and bliss on to the beautiful Sholly.

    1. Thanks Sis❤️. Amen! Amen!
      We will always have room to bless God!

  6. Thank you for this beautiful piece ma'am and a big thank you to our PapaGod who gives us beauty for ashes.
    I celebrate your life and how you're living it out loud through this very trying times.
    The Lord God of Heaven who is helping you will never stop. Amen.

  7. Thank you Tolu. Amen! God will never stop helping us🙏🏽


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