Monday, 27 February 2017

Now, Healing Can Begin...

I had my doubts about how I would feel after the Service of Songs and the Celebration of my sister's Beautiful Life. I feared that not being given the chance to see her, hug her one last time and say my farewells would prevent my heart from accepting that it was time to allow healing begin. 

But I was wrong. Thank God.

Yes, thank you PapaGod for demonstrating how powerful celebrating and honoring our loved ones can be. You see, as deep as my hurt is; as broken as my heart is and as devastated as I am about Sholly passing what pained me even more was how she was treated in death. 

How Kuba could treat Sholly, a woman he claimed to love the way he did baffles me. I refuse with every fiber in me to believe that 'that's how the Polish people are'. No, an entire country can't be cold, selfish and heartless. There is something fundamentally wrong with Kuba and his family. And I want to believe there are some of his country people who have heard of this story and know deep in their hearts that something is just not right about all this. 

Anyway, I digress. Sholly deserved better than the Gaska family gave her. She deserved to be celebrated for who she was and the joy she brought to many. Those who loved her and had been touched by her life deserved an opportunity to come together to celebrate her young yet impactful life. 

And that's what, to the shame of the devil and the glory of God, we achieved on Wednesday, February 22, 2017. And I'm so thankful to God right now. Because, even though I cried myself to sleep that night, contrary to my fears, I actually did wake up the next day feeling lighter. The pain in my heart, while still there was less suffocating.

The sights and sounds of that evening  at the City of David; Sholly's smiles on the screen; the  carefully selected and symbolic songs and hymns had taken the place of the images in my head of my sister being sent off in silence to be cremated all alone like she had no one. Came from nowhere. Was never loved.

Righting that wrong brought me peace and for the first time I was able to sincerely invite God in to begin our journey towards healing. I took my time to plan this service; every bit of it and while it didn't go 100% as planned I feel blessed especially as everyone that attended that has spoken to me has said the ceremony was beautiful. Just like my Sholly.

It's still tough and I still cry everyday but I feel the healing going on inside me. I'd like to encourage you to celebrate the people in your life deserving of same. You don't have to wait till they are gone.  

Celebrating our loved ones is good and even though Sholly has gone home, honoring her helped me tremendously so imagine how you will feel doing same for loved ones you still have here with you. 


As I heal, please be assured that I'll also continue to chase after the truth.
Healing is one thing, closure is another. For closure, my family and I need to know what really happened to Sholly. 


  1. Bolanle mi owon. You are a woman like none other. Thank you so much for loving your Sholly so loudly.

    1. Thank you SnrSis Shade and especially for the lovely souvenirs. Sholly would have loved the tubs of scented shea butter cream. They were just perfect. God bless you.

  2. I know that we have a God who reveals deep and secret things; HE will surely reveal this unto us in Jesus name! I will keep standing with you in prayers ma!! Love you always.

  3. It was a great and beautiful service. May the Lord continue to heal you and may you find closure..

  4. So touching. I pray that y'all find that so much needed closure. May Kuba and his family know no peace till they tell the true story.

    God's peace envelopes you.

  5. God is still God and when you said 'love is a verb'i started asking myself if am ahowing enough love to thoae i claim i hasnt stopped ringing in ny head like.God will surely make a way.

  6. God will perfect the healing sis. You are a strong woman and I know the God who sees and know all will give answers to your questions. At this point, be still as you chase after the quietness is our strength..listen for the still voice.

  7. Thank God healing as started. May the God of all comfort, continue to comfort you and your family

  8. Enter your comment...i still remember yhe sweet Shola im FUT Staff School, way back. I celebrate her life and not mourn. She is resting in the Lord while Kuba remains in this wicked world, God will divinely work it out, He alone sees the unseen, He alone is the Why? how? He will show Himself sooner than tou think. Trust Him and relax. #iknowmyGod #itrustmyGod

  9. My dear Salt, thank you for celebrating the life of your beloved sister the way you have done. May the Lord perfect His healing in your heart. The Balm of Gilead is abundantly available to you and present with you to salve the deep wounds of your heart. God is a just God. He will right the wrong the way only He can.

  10. I am really glad that healing has begun for you, Sis. ...May her beautiful soul rest in perfect peace.

  11. She is so blessed to have had you as loving Sister. May the good Lord heal you quickly beyond your imaginations. May God's Peace and love never depart your family. This will be an end to every untimely death in your family in Jesus name.

  12. Bola. May Sholly's precious soul Rest In Peace. You're in my prayers.

  13. Thank you ALL so much for coming by and taking the time to leave a message, a prayers and for just standing with u...Thank you ALL.

    And AMEN to all your prayers.

  14. Love so strong. I love you for loving your sister so dearly. I pray she rests in perfect peace and God grants your family peace and comfort. As for awon Gaska family, they deserve every thing coming. God is God. Stay blessed sis.


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