Friday, 16 March 2012

Murderer.

Unlike Rihanna, I want to be a murderer.
 
I know, can I get any more dramatic? *smiling sheepishly*. True, this blog title is a tad over the bar but like I always say na me get this blog so I fit do am anyway I like. And right now, I am in a very murderous mood so truth has got to be told. I feel like aiming a gun and shooting down a whole bunch of peace-robbers and sleep-killers. I mean, is that not fair? You kill my sleep, I kill you. Sounds fair enough to me. I mean, here I am popping pills to help me sleep but oh no! Mr. negative, self destructive thoughts and his cohorts wont let a woman be! Something has got to give. Yep, something, someone has got to die and I am gonna do it myself. I am going to kill negative thoughts! Today, I become a cold blooded murderer!

Listen, join me. It's really not that macabre. We won't even go to jail. There will be no blood-letting, no slashing of necks and definitely no stashing of body parts in bins! OK, so I am trying too hard to be morbidly funny. Forgive and/or manage me like that. It's just that am sick and tired of sword-fighting with my mind. So rather than continue to spar with negative thoughts I just want to murder them outright! The devil and his negativity deserve nothing less than cold blooded murder and I am a right fit for the job. Never killed anyone before but me thinks that armed with the Sword of God's Word I am Dirty Harriet and the devil is just some low-life punk that is about to ''make my day''. *imagine me standing with serious swag with one eyebrow arched a la Clint Eastwood as he eyeballs the said punk just before he dispatches him to the world beyond*

Ah, the bliss of blogging. I am actually smiling to myself, You see why I come here?Why I call this place my mental spa? Blogging centres me. Now that I am calmer I am pleased to let you know that all bad vibes are gone now. Yep! I am in a serene place now. I know that God is on my side and as long as I continue to lean on him, I will remain standing. I also know that God would never make me go through anything he knew I could not survive so no shaking. I will live to testify.  On the other hand, these negative, mind numbing, time stealing, self-destructive thoughts have got to die and I'm gonna kill them!
 
Today, I am gonna be a murderer!
 
 
P. S. Knowing the goat, I will have to become a repeat offender cos the devil and his cohorts don't die easy. We just got to keep killing them over and over. Ammunition? Praise, The Word and my latest discovery - crazy dancing to loud music until you get so dizzy no thought can stay in your head, good or bad! Lovl. 

11 comments:

  1. ha ha, I'm right beside you... death to the peace thieves... give them a side kick with a 'hallelujah', an upper cut with a dance move, fling them over your head with confessing God's word concerning you and give the final life taking blow with the name "JESUS"

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    Replies
    1. FQ, you nailed it. All I can say is 'Gbam!

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  2. Trully she nailed it. Me na takwando praise i go take finish him head.

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    1. Kia! Off with its head! Kia! Off with its head! I'm channeling all my mean-ness his way now. All my pent up angst? It has a target now. And one I don't have to feel bad about.

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  3. ROTFL!!!!!! You drama queen! Chei! LOOOOL. Complete with the picture someone with a gun, Kai DNW!
    As for dramatic titles, I am all for it! The more dramatic, the more it piques. Go on sun hun
    This has made my weekend.

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    Replies
    1. Zee, I tell you.....anger can be positive. You just need to focus it on the right 'thing'.....the goat called Satan. Lol, I was walking around all night praying and asking the devil 'do you feel lucky? Try me!

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  4. Hahahahahahahahaha! I absolutely love this post!!! It certainly helped me to 'snap' out of it. Lol. Come on sister, let's do this in the name of the Lord (*gun [bible] on shoulder, ready to roll*). Lololol.

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    Replies
    1. Ms. Buki, *standing hands hanging loose over my gun belt ready to fire*, Come one sisdivine, let's wage this war! Best bit? Its a fixed fight in our favour! Thanks for coming by!

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  5. I wanna be your partner in crime cos it seems we have a common enemy.

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  6. Brilliant Ilola. You be Thelma, I will be Louise! Let's get this sucker! Just like Ceecee says, we must not let him take one more bit of our territory!

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  7. This is the best post ever! Complete with all the comments!!!!!!!!!!!

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